social beings

i know that we are created to be social beings. take adam and eve, for example. God said that it was not suitable for adam to be alone and therefore went through the process to find someone to complement him. there came eve.

so we are humans that are to live in relation to one another. not necessarily saying that each person needs to get married and have a partner for the rest of their life, but fellowship is essential to life.

thus, my dilemma.
to be honest, i feel like i'm pretty introverted and would rather stay in my own bubble. i don't mind being alone and entertaining myself through watching videos. of course, i also thoroughly enjoy hanging out laughing with close comfortable friends. but i really really dislike going into situations where i feel awkward, aka where i do not know many of the people there despite maybe knowing some people. or just knowing people barely. and as a result, sometimes i don't want to socialize and force myself to speak and be friendly. in general, for most of you who know me, when people initially meet me, they feel i'm really bubbly, but i think that after people get to know me, i'm a lot more toned down person who just enjoys good and interesting conversation.
this kind of bothers me to be honest. sometimes my conscience feels really guilty when i skip out on events where i know i would feel socially awkward. i have times where i force myself to go also. andy preached two weeks ago on living with guilt. he did mention that sometimes we have false guilty feelings even when we do right things. i'm not saying that what i'm doing is right, but is it possible that it's not wrong? this makes me feel really conflicted.

that being said, i have spoken a bit on this issue with my parents, the idea of socializing. what comforted me about that conversation is that my dad told me that i have to have a different perspective when i step out of my bubble to talk to people. [i know it is important to step out of my comfort zone] i need to have God's eyes essentially. His eyes to see hurting people and want to build relations with others. but the thing is i do not need to always feel like i have to be buddy buddy with every person that i do not know in the room. having a few good solid conversations is good enough. maybe i set really high standards for myself becuase there are times when i feel that way. these words have encouraged me to speak with more people that i do not know even when i do not feel like it.

however, the question is: if i have a choice for whether or not i should go to some neutral event, and i know that i probably will not enjoy it because i do not know the people there very well, and i have sort of things to do that day, is it wrong not to go? i mean on the seventh day, God did rest. this shows that as people there are times where we'll need to be recharged and refreshed. we do God's work seven days throughout the week but we should always allow time to have Him refill us so we can be renewed.

i have a tendency to overwork myself and attend every event i can in my power. it can be a flaw. sigh.